Global Leaders Concerned as Trump Spends Entirety of Trade Summit Trying to Sell Xi Limited Edition High-Tops on May 14, 2026May 14, 2026 Posted by Charlie Tread
Reflecting Pool Converted Into Trump-Branded Pickleball Complex on May 14, 2026 Posted by Sameer Wallace
Exhausted Public Collectively Agrees It Doesn’t Have Time to Give a Shit About Hantavirus on May 13, 2026 Posted by Rachel Ortega
REPORT: Kash Patel Wanted FBI Tactical Gear to Include Beer Helmets on May 12, 2026May 12, 2026 Posted by Charlie Tread
Coachella Attendees Report Deeper Emotional Connection to Their Own Faces Than to Any Artist on Stage
Staffers Avoiding White House Café After Hegseth Launches Extended Slam Poetry Series on Global Military Strategy
CNN Rebrands as “Conservative News Network,” Insists It’s Totally Unrelated to Right Wing Billionaire Takeover
Viewers Outraged by Kid Rock Performing Halftime Show in Drunken, Slurred, Out of Synch, Redneck Gibberish Instead of English
Sources Say Trump Considering Nicki Minaj as New Fed Chair Because She ‘Talks Tough’ and ‘Knows Money’
Trump Announces ‘Patriot Games’, Where Children Will Compete for Lower Gas Prices, Basic Healthcare, and Affordable Eggs
Luigi Mangione Cast in New Reality Show ‘Yeah, But Those Cheekbones’ That Asks Viewers to Decide Their Own Moral Framework
Sydney Sweeney Confirms Her Political Beliefs Are “Whatever Polls Best With People Who Still Go to Movie Theaters”
