World Cup Welcome Packet to Include Phrasebook, Sunscreen, and Waiver for El Salvadoran Prison on December 6, 2025 Posted by Sameer Wallace
CDC Announces Newborns Can Replace Vaccines With “A Lap Around a Gas Station Bathroom” on December 5, 2025 Posted by Unsourced Newsroom
DoJ Realizes It Can’t Indict Letitia James Because It Fired Everyone Who Could Explain What a Crime Is on December 5, 2025 Posted by Samantha White
Netflix–WBD Assumes Total Control of Hollywood, Appoints Algorithm as Supreme Showrunner on December 5, 2025 Posted by Rachel Ortega
Melania Unveils This Years White House Christmas Decor: A Bare, Cold Corridor Symbolizing the Emptiness of the Human Soul
Kennedy Center Perplexed by Lagging Ticket Sales After Audience Held Captive and Forced to Watch Apprentice Musical
Meteorologists Describe Hurricane Melissa McCarthy as “Loud, Unpredictable, and Full of Body Positivity”
Parents Told “Costume Incomplete” Until Child Summons Five Choreographed Minions from the Nether Realm
