Month: February 2018

Philly Celebrates Superbowl Win by Burning Philly to the Ground

After decades of fruitless attempts, the Philadelphia Eagles brought home their first ever Superbowl Championship by upsetting the heavily favored New England Patriots in Superbowl LII. To celebrate the unprecedented victory, Philadelphia citizens took to the streets and destroyed the “City of Brotherly Love” in a show of unbridled enthusiasm and kinship. Long known as […]

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Trump immigrants

Trump Suggests Immigrants Wear Identifying Badges

WASHINGTON, DC — As immigration continues to be a hotly debated policy issue, president Trump has signaled he may be willing to negotiate with Democrats. Yesterday, after much back and forth, Trump released a statement with his “final solution” to the ongoing talks. The White House has offered a set of guidelines that would allow […]

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