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Congress Demands Fauci Explain Why Puppies Are So Cute

Congress Demands Fauci Explain Why Puppies Are So Cute

on July 30, 2026
Posted by Samantha White
Congress Solves Budget Crisis By Scheduling Much Bigger Budget Crisis For Later

Congress Solves Budget Crisis By Scheduling Much Bigger Budget Crisis For Later

on July 23, 2026
Posted by Samantha White
DNC Intern Who Forgot to Rig 2024 Election Mistakenly Thought It Would Blow Over

DNC Intern Who Forgot to Rig 2024 Election Mistakenly Thought It Would Blow Over

on July 17, 2026
Posted by Samantha White
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NBA Wonders How Gambling Became Such a Problem After Partnering With Every Gambling Company on Earth

NBA Wonders How Gambling Became Such a Problem After Partnering With Every Gambling Company on Earth

RFK Jr. Urges Americans to Only Seek Medical Advice from “Friends Who’ve Done Their Own Research”

RFK Jr. Urges Americans to Only Seek Medical Advice from “Friends Who’ve Done Their Own Research”

Curator Admits Louvre Heist Could’ve Been Prevented If Alarm System Wasn’t So “Avant-Garde”

Curator Admits Louvre Heist Could’ve Been Prevented If Alarm System Wasn’t So “Avant-Garde”

Kim Kardashian Sheds Final Human Layer, Emerges Smooth and Dishwasher Safe

Kim Kardashian Sheds Final Human Layer, Emerges Smooth and Dishwasher Safe

“It All Happened So Fast,” Says Excavator Operator Who Spent Six Hours Methodically Leveling White House

“It All Happened So Fast,” Says Excavator Operator Who Spent Six Hours Methodically Leveling White House

Lifelong Friends Hold Vigil for Group Chat Destroyed by Ted’s Samsung Galaxy

Lifelong Friends Hold Vigil for Group Chat Destroyed by Ted’s Samsung Galaxy

Family’s Fully Loaded Aldi Cart Declared “Obscene Display of Wealth”

Family’s Fully Loaded Aldi Cart Declared “Obscene Display of Wealth”

Experts Recommend Replacing Doomscrolling With Gentle, Nutrient-Rich Dumbscrolling Before Bed

Experts Recommend Replacing Doomscrolling With Gentle, Nutrient-Rich Dumbscrolling Before Bed

Report: 98% of NBA Players Claim “Best Shape of My Life,” Remaining 2% Are Nikola Jokić

Report: 98% of NBA Players Claim “Best Shape of My Life,” Remaining 2% Are Nikola Jokić

White House Unveils Plans for Champagne Fountain and Presidential DJ Booth

White House Unveils Plans for Champagne Fountain and Presidential DJ Booth

Musk Announces New Astronomy Subscription Plan: $9.99 a Month to See the Stars Satellite-Free

Musk Announces New Astronomy Subscription Plan: $9.99 a Month to See the Stars Satellite-Free

Budget Negotiators Reach Historic Deal: Everyone Gets Less and Still Calls It a Win

Budget Negotiators Reach Historic Deal: Everyone Gets Less and Still Calls It a Win

Parents Told “Costume Incomplete” Until Child Summons Five Choreographed Minions from the Nether Realm

Parents Told “Costume Incomplete” Until Child Summons Five Choreographed Minions from the Nether Realm

Company Holds Meeting to Discuss How to Have Fewer Meetings

Company Holds Meeting to Discuss How to Have Fewer Meetings

BREAKING: Shohei Ohtani Tests Negative for Human DNA

BREAKING: Shohei Ohtani Tests Negative for Human DNA

Taylor Swift Rumored to Be Working on Album Entirely About Ticketmaster

Taylor Swift Rumored to Be Working on Album Entirely About Ticketmaster

Global Economists Agree: It’s Fine, We’ll Just Print More Optimism

Global Economists Agree: It’s Fine, We’ll Just Print More Optimism

Baseball Analytics Team Announces They’ve Officially Replaced Joy with Data

Baseball Analytics Team Announces They’ve Officially Replaced Joy with Data

Hollywood Celebrates First Film Entirely Written, Directed, and Canceled by AI

Hollywood Celebrates First Film Entirely Written, Directed, and Canceled by AI

Chris Pine Cast as Chris Pratt in Upcoming Chris Evans Biopic

Chris Pine Cast as Chris Pratt in Upcoming Chris Evans Biopic

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  • Congress Demands Fauci Explain Why Puppies Are So Cute
  • Congress Solves Budget Crisis By Scheduling Much Bigger Budget Crisis For Later
  • DNC Intern Who Forgot to Rig 2024 Election Mistakenly Thought It Would Blow Over

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