PHILADELPHIA — In what experts are calling “the logical endpoint of modern parenting,” local couple Dana and Chris Templeton were informed by their 9-year-old daughter that her K-Pop Demon Hunter Halloween costume would not be “authentic” without at least five backup dancers “summoned from the abyss” and properly trained in synchronized combat pop choreography.
“We already spent $140 on the sequin armor and imported fog machine,” said Chris, staring blankly into the middle distance. “Now she says the aura doesn’t look right unless the dancers materialize in formation behind her. I don’t even know how to rent a nether realm.”
Witnesses report the child spent the weekend performing ritualized choreography in the living room, chanting lyrics in what experts confirmed was “either Korean or Old Babylonian,” until the curtains briefly ignited in what the family now describes as “a light pyrotechnic rehearsal.”
The five summoned entities, described as “fabulously dressed and uncomfortably flexible,” immediately began rehearsing under the child’s direction. Neighbors said they’ve seen flashes of light, clouds of glitter, and heard repeated cries of “Drop the beat, mortals!” emanating from the home.
“We used to worry about screen time,” said mother Dana. “Now we’re just trying to keep the living room from becoming a portal to Seoul.”
Despite parental concerns, the performance has drawn rave reviews from classmates. “She really captured the K-Pop vibe,” said one peer. “The demons were totally in sync, and the confetti smelled like bubblegum and despair.”
At press time, the family was reportedly debating whether to send the minions home after Halloween or sign them to a long-term management deal. Industry insiders predict a full world tour by Christmas.
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