Breaking News:
Saturday, Feb 22, 2025
Hawaiian tourists have suffered through nearly a week of disrupted nature tours due to the explosion of the Kilauea Volcano on Hawaii’s Big Island. As lava flows have cut off several of the islands most popular trails, many hikers are desperately trying not to allow it to ruin their vacation. “We came here for the […]
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WASHINGTON, DC — As immigration continues to be a hotly debated policy issue, president Trump has signaled he may be willing to negotiate with Democrats. Yesterday, after much back and forth, Trump released a statement with his “final solution” to the ongoing talks. The White House has offered a set of guidelines that would allow […]
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A recent poll found that very few people know who Adolf Hitler is because they are not constantly reminded of him by monuments in public parks and political grounds. This is startling affirmation of what many in the Trump administration have been saying about the removal of Confederate statues in the United States. Chief of […]
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Today, the Trump administration announced the president would not visit the Korean Demilitarized Zone(DMZ) on his upcoming trip to Asia, citing sudden bone spur inflammation. The bone spurs have plagued Trump for decades, preventing him from confronting danger for most of his life. Traditionally, US presidents have visited the DMZ as a symbolic gesture of […]
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Despite the ban on imported goods from North Korea, evidence suggests China continues to import large quantities of seafood from the rogue nation. North Korea currently earns $300 million a year from their seafood trade with China, and Trump led sanctions seem to have had little effect. “You can’t get crabs anywhere close to the size […]
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In a surprising break from long held agency protocol, EPA head Scott Pruitt issued an arrest warrant for 90’s eco-hero Captain Planet. Although the circumstances surrounding the warrant have yet to be disclosed, Pruitt publicly declared Planet a “threat to American and current EPA policy.” Planet helmed a wildly popular children’s show in the 90’s […]
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MENDOCINO, CA — Under heavy criticism for tweeting while the world literally burns, Trump made an unscheduled trip to central California to visit victims of the worst wildfires in decades. Ten lives have already been lost as thousands of residents have been forced to flee their homes to escape the aggressive blaze which has already […]
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After losing their capital of Raqqa, ISIS made a surprising declaration of victory in the the most effective terrorist campaign of the modern era. As governments across the world sit on the edge of collapse, the terrorist organization claims it has succeeded in its goal to destabilize western democracy. “I think we did an excellent […]
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In a startling show of diplomacy, North Korean dictator Kim Jong Un has halted his nuclear weapons program in the wake of the tragic mass shooting in Las Vegas Sunday night, that left over 50 Americans dead. While some view this as progress towards an armistice between the US and the rogue nation, analysts believe […]
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Spanish Government Places Beds and Couches in Public to Encourage Napping During Vote As tensions rise in Barcelona, the Spanish government has littered the streets with thousands of mattresses, couches, and eye masks in the hopes that Catalan protesters will sleep through a secession vote which Madrid deems illegal. Spaniards, famous for their midday “siestas”, […]
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North Korean Dictator Condemns US Policing System Known for ruling with an iron fist, North Korean leader Kim Jung Un made a surprising move today by criticizing the frequency of police shootings in the US. While many believe this may have been a political move to reacquire President Trump’s attention, others hope it is a […]
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Social Media Giant Plans to Crack Down on “Fake News” In light of recent revelations that Russian operatives used Facebook advertising to disseminate false information about candidate Hillary Clinton, Facebook has decided to begin monitoring “fake news”. Although many Trump supporters themselves call this move “fake news”, several have already found themselves banned for 24 […]
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Desperate Airline Struggles to Keep Up with Demand In a surprise move, Ryanair announced it would be upgrading first class passengers to the pilot’s chair in an effort to prevent further cancellations. This marks the first time an airline has allowed passengers to pilot an aircraft and only the second time passengers have refused upgrades. […]
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Puerto Rico Faces Humanitarian Disaster A week after Hurricane Maria wreaked havoc on the shores of Puerto Rico, aid has still not arrived. With nearly 3 million American citizens without power, basic necessities like food, fuel and water have grown scarce. President Trump and FEMA have faced criticism for their slow response. While Trump’s visit […]
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Far-right Claims 94 Seats in German Parliament Germany’s AfD party took 12.6% of votes in elections on Monday, marking the first time the young party has garnered significant public support in its four year history. The AfD focuses on anti-immigration, nationalism, and anti-Islamisation policy. The demographic of those who voted for the party mirrored many […]
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Kim Jong Un Out Vocabulates Trump In a surprisingly lucid video statement, North Korean dictator Kim Jong Un criticized US president Donald Trump for his recent verbal attacks on his country while addressing the United Nations on Thursday, in which Trump called for Kim to step down or be “completely destroyed” by the US. While […]
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