Breaking News:
Wednesday, Nov 20, 2024
WASHINGTON, DC – Doubling down on their assertion that the “Boos” heard during last night’s telecast of the World Series were not meant to insult the President, White House Press Secretary Stephanie Grisham claims many of the 41,000 in attendance at Nationals Park were simply making ghostly sounds in honor of Halloween. Immediately after the […]
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WASHINGTON, DC — In a surprise move that pushed the limits of his cover, Russian operative Mitkh Mikkonilov was able to single-handedly defeat two election security bills that were brought before the Senate. Familiarly known by his cover identity, Mitch McConnell, Mikkonilov has quietly climbed the political ranks to become the Senate Majority Leader. During […]
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WASHINGTON, D.C. — As the rumored dismissal of one of the longest tenured and most stable members of the Trump administration draws near, many in the White House wonder what impact John Kelly’s departure will have on the presidency and who will fill his shoes. As an ominous warning to any future Chiefs of Staff […]
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NEW YORK, NY — In an apparent response to Nike’s surprise endorsement of former NFL quarterback Colin Kaepernick, Adidas inked a last minute endorsement deal with President Trump. This comes on the heels of nationwide protests by citizens who consider Kaepernick “Unamerican” for his peaceful protests against racial inequality and police brutality. This has led […]
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In a stunning display of generosity, Russia has offered to provide free accommodations to all family members of World Cup stars for the duration of their time in the tournament. The wives and children of some of the world’s most accomplished players will be kept in luxury accommodations at undisclosed locations throughout Russia. Argentinian star […]
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It’s not just governance, international relations, social issues, and global standing as a whole that are plaguing the US, it’s also the Winter Olympic medal count. America’s international standing has suffered immensely since electing a reality star president, and the trend seems to continue in the global competition. After finishing first or second in medal […]
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After decades of fruitless attempts, the Philadelphia Eagles brought home their first ever Superbowl Championship by upsetting the heavily favored New England Patriots in Superbowl LII. To celebrate the unprecedented victory, Philadelphia citizens took to the streets and destroyed the “City of Brotherly Love” in a show of unbridled enthusiasm and kinship. Long known as […]
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Newly uncovered video reveals former sports broadcaster Leeann Tweeden calling two male guests ‘gay’ after watching them walk on their hands for an on air segment. The shocking footage calls to question the kind of behavior Tweeden deemed acceptable during her time as a sportcaster and comedian. The comment speaks to the culture in which […]
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Today, the White House kicked of the holiday season with its first inaugural baby eating competition. Although the unusual event has sparked controversy, president Trump shrugged off critics and proceeded with the contest at his Mar-a-Lago resort. Trump addressed the crowd before the starting bell, “No matter what I do, the fake news will always […]
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Amid rising furor over his degrading comments to a female reporter, Carolina Panthers quarterback Cam Newton offered a public apology and a grab of the pussy to the reporter and his fans. These words are similar to words used by then candidate Donald Trump in audio unearthed during the presidential campaign in which he said, […]
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Nearly 1/3 of Viewers Say They Plan to Boycott League President Trump has successfully made the NFL a symbol of anti-American sentiment. Although player’s kneeling for the national anthem was a show of unity and protest against police brutality, Trump has spun it into a show of disrespect and hatred for the armed forces. This […]
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Trump Continues to Criticize the NFL In a recent statement President Trump continued to drag out his spat with the NFL players and owners. “They have rules for everything: You can’t dance in the end zone. You can’t wear the pink socks, relative to breast cancer…They have rules for everything. Why aren’t they honoring this country […]
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Conservatives Just Can’t Understand NFL Actions After several days of discussion, conservatives still cannot understand why NFL players and owners locked arms and kneeled during the national anthem. In fact, many conservative pundits still insist that the purpose was the exact opposite of its actual meaning. Fox News has stated the actions were “divisive” and […]
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