New Iran Deal Allows Tankers to Round Up Toll Fees to Support Local Warlords on June 15, 2026 Posted by Rachel Ortega
SpaceX IPO Earns Musk Earns Title of Poorest Excuse for a Human Being on June 12, 2026 Posted by Sameer Wallace
FIFA Shocked to Learn International Fans Unwilling to Spend $4,000 to Be Harassed for Their Papers on June 10, 2026 Posted by Sameer Wallace
RFK Jr. Defends Snacking on Buckets of Screwworms During CDC Briefing on June 8, 2026 Posted by Samantha White
Luigi Mangione Cast in New Reality Show ‘Yeah, But Those Cheekbones’ That Asks Viewers to Decide Their Own Moral Framework
Sydney Sweeney Confirms Her Political Beliefs Are “Whatever Polls Best With People Who Still Go to Movie Theaters”
Melania Unveils This Years White House Christmas Decor: A Bare, Cold Corridor Symbolizing the Emptiness of the Human Soul
Kennedy Center Perplexed by Lagging Ticket Sales After Audience Held Captive and Forced to Watch Apprentice Musical
Meteorologists Describe Hurricane Melissa McCarthy as “Loud, Unpredictable, and Full of Body Positivity”
Parents Told “Costume Incomplete” Until Child Summons Five Choreographed Minions from the Nether Realm
