Amazon Sponsors Met Gala, Suggests Cheaper, Worse Version of Every Outfit on May 5, 2026May 5, 2026 Posted by Rachel Ortega
Trump Nominates Fox News Sound Guy as Commander of U.S. Strategic Command on May 1, 2026 Posted by Samantha White
SCOTUS Deems Witch-Burning Constitutional as Long as Accused Given Opportunity to Confess on April 30, 2026 Posted by Samantha White
Trump Announces ‘Patriot Games’, Where Children Will Compete for Lower Gas Prices, Basic Healthcare, and Affordable Eggs
Global Shipping on Alert After US Navy Ships Spotted Flying Jolly Rogers and Demanding Tribute From Passing Vessels
Trump Insists He’s Mentally Fit After Mistaking a Reporter for His Childhood Imaginary Friend, ‘Blinky the Corn Angel’
Marco Rubio Says He Finally Gets What Americans Are Going Through, Announces Plan to Switch Government Font Back to Times New Roman
New Book “Franklin Goes to the Hague to Stand Trial for War Crimes” Helps Kids Navigate Big Feelings Like Sharing, Apologies, and Crimes Against Humanity
After Another Outburst, Trump Insists He Loves Women, Just Not When They’re Standing, Speaking, or Asking Questions