Amazon Sponsors Met Gala, Suggests Cheaper, Worse Version of Every Outfit on May 5, 2026May 5, 2026 Posted by Rachel Ortega
Trump Nominates Fox News Sound Guy as Commander of U.S. Strategic Command on May 1, 2026 Posted by Samantha White
SCOTUS Deems Witch-Burning Constitutional as Long as Accused Given Opportunity to Confess on April 30, 2026 Posted by Samantha White
Disney World Guests Alarmed by Childless 70-Year-Old Man Who Spent Entire Day Alone Waiting to Hug Animatronic Presidents
Staffers Avoiding White House Café After Hegseth Launches Extended Slam Poetry Series on Global Military Strategy
Confused Kushner and Witkoff Spotted in LA’s Tehrangeles Neighborhood Demanding Peace Talks with “Whoever’s In Charge”
Guy Who Asked “Is Duke Good?” 3 Days Ago Now Hosting Daily Strategy Meetings on NCAA Tournament Outlook
Lindsey Graham Advocates for Total Destruction of Iran Along With Any Gay Sex Videos Israel Might Have of Him