SpaceX IPO Earns Musk Earns Title of Poorest Excuse for a Human Being on June 12, 2026 Posted by Sameer Wallace
FIFA Shocked to Learn International Fans Unwilling to Spend $4,000 to Be Harassed for Their Papers on June 10, 2026 Posted by Sameer Wallace
RFK Jr. Defends Snacking on Buckets of Screwworms During CDC Briefing on June 8, 2026 Posted by Samantha White
Trump Moves NBA Finals to White House Court So He Doesn’t Have to Leave Couch on June 5, 2026 Posted by Sameer Wallace
Lindsey Graham Advocates for Total Destruction of Iran Along With Any Gay Sex Videos Israel Might Have of Him
As Gas Prices Surge, Trump Says Americans Should Look Into Electric Golf Carts Like the One He’s Driving
Officials Say Barron Trump Must Remain Stateside to Retrieve the Folder Labeled “Other People’s Kids”
Trump Vows to Ramble Incoherently On All Topics Unrelated to the State or the Union in Historic State of the Union Address
Administration Desperately Seeking New Ways to Cripple U.S. Economy After SCOTUS Rules Against Tariffs
RFK Jr. and Kid Rock Announce Bipartisan Fitness Initiative After Ripping Rails off Toilet Seats in Matching Denim Gym Suits
Lutnick Admits He Visited Epstein’s Pedophile Island, but Only Because the Lunch Buffet Was Too Good to Pass Up
