SCOTUS Deems Witch-Burning Constitutional as Long as Accused Given Opportunity to Confess on April 30, 2026 Posted by Samantha White
DOJ Charges Comey With Look-Maxxing to Make Presidential Jawline Appear Weak on April 28, 2026 Posted by Samantha White
Poll Finds Lego Trump “More Grounded,” Mainly Because It Must Be Operated by a Child on April 23, 2026 Posted by Rachel Ortega
Tim Cook to Be Replaced by Near-Identical, More Expensive CEO with a Nicer Camera on April 22, 2026 Posted by Sameer Wallace
Sydney Sweeney Confirms Her Political Beliefs Are “Whatever Polls Best With People Who Still Go to Movie Theaters”
